Dear friends/allies, it is better, to be honest, and upfront before you speak up. Know the facts and say the right things the first time!

Photo by yang Miao on Unsplash

Dear friends/allies (leaders),

I will love to start with my most profound appreciation to everyone who has called, texted, reached out to check-in. Thank you for caring and listening, now we have to make lasting change.

At some point, in the immediate future, you will get an opportunity to speak up, or you will have a ‘mic’ turned on for interviews, opinions, etc.


Make sure you get it right on your first try, and here are some tips to help you prepare for your moment in the spotlight.

So before you step to the mic, understand the issues, and know how you can help.

Know the baits and learn why they are live wire:

  1. All arguments on the different types of lives (black, blue, all, etc.)
  2. The idea that patriotism and constitutional rights are mutually exclusive.

Know the facts and understand them:

3. Advocacy is ideal and necessary if injustice exists. Learn to pivot the conversation back to the issue

4. Advocating for a specific group such as black lives doesn’t mean you dislike other lives

5. Understand that the core issue is equality; all lives matter, but unfortunately, that’s not how things are yet, hence why people are in the streets protesting (which is their constitutional rights btw) clamoring and fighting for justice.

7. Here’s the kicker, until black lives matter, not all lives matter. Blacks aren’t asking for more than just to be treated equally

Lastly, this is a ‘new’ terrain so -

8. Ask questions, especially when you feel like what you are about to write or say could be misunderstood. Ask and confirm

9. Feel free to ask someone to spot check your ‘ally’ notes, write-up or ideas

10. Be honest, if you get tired along the way, which could happen, don’t break up via ‘text’ let’s have the problematic face-to-face (or zoom) chat

11. Change demands courage. Be courageous!

Check out some free learning materials on Allyship here:




Leadership Psychologist, Executive Coach, Public Speaker & Strategist

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Dr. Flo Falayi

Dr. Flo Falayi

Leadership Psychologist, Executive Coach, Public Speaker & Strategist

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